He starts talking about your future from the second date. He’s got a beach house and enjoys theatre and dining at fine restaurants. This is all so sudden and so incredibly wonderful…Or is it? It Happened to Me I have a dating coaching client right now who just had a brush with this kind of man. Interestingly enough, some romance junkies actually believe their own stories. Because its junkie behavior generated from an addiction. If you could just fix whatever thing you did wrong.
He was so kind and understanding, and whenever he was sick I wanted to show him that I appreciated him. Renton is a good person, and I never wanted him to think I was judging him. I sat at the cafe down the street for an hour until I was sure he’d left for work, and walked heavy back to the house. He laughed easier than I’d remember he was even capable of.
I was mostly proud of him, and he’s a human with a problem. Such a thin line between being supportive and enabling. I’d start throwing my books and records in a suitcase and hold back the tears so I could tell him in a mature and final way that I couldn’t do this anymore. I wrote him a letter, packed a couple of bags, and I just left. But I wasn’t confident that if I told him again to his face that my resolve wouldn’t break when he made empty promises with those wet, beautiful eyes. I couldn’t bear the thought of leaving him completely alone. For my little family, my home, and because I wasn’t enough. There was a moment a few months after we broke up that he told me he had been clean since I left, and would I come home? I gave him the cliche stock answer, "I’m happy for you.
Even though, by most standards, our relationship didn’t "work out," and we both suffered terribly, I learned so much from Renton and the years we spent together. I learned empathy, forgiveness, and patience, and how it goes both ways.
Most of all, I learned what it really means to be a true friend.
This incredible, amazing man with a highly evolved sense of romance is still a junkie. If he can’t get enough, if he has to see you all the time, if he’s constantly in touch, these are red flags waving!